Adaptation
So, I've been in Cairo for over five weeks now, and while I certainly don't feel "at home," it's interesting to realize how much I have adapted to my crazy-different surroundings. I remember my first week, staying in the hostel, when I would sit around with friends and talk about how insane everything here is, and how I would be miserable and harrassed for the next three months ... but I guess people can get used to anything, eh?
Most notably, I'm not hassled by touts like I used to be. Now, part of it is that I'm not frequenting tourist sites - clearly, there will be more people to contend with outside the Egyptian Museum than in my residential neighborhood - but I think it's more than that. I've developed the all-important skill of IGNORING EVERYONE.
I was raised to be polite, and although I sometimes slip up, as a general rule, I'm a huge fan of common courtesy. And so, when people talk to me, it's pretty natural for me to answer. This, of course, is how the many harrassing sales-people get their openings. They say "Hello" or "Welcome to Egypt" or whatever, and as soon as the foreigner responds in kind, the game begins. So what I needed to do was JUST NOT ANSWER.
It's harder than it sounds. If someone is clearly speaking to ME (and if they're speaking in English, it's fair to assume they're speaking to me), it's automatic for me to respond with the standard niceties. But this impulse always lead me to trouble here, and so I needed to quash it.
As evidence of my success, consider this: one morning, walking from my minibus to the office, a young man started walking beside me. "Hello," he said. "Where you from?" I didn't answer, and he just kept up - "What's your name?" "Where you going?" and so on. It was HARD to say nothing, and I actually tried to rack my brain for the right thing to say to get him to go away without thinking I'm a royal bitch (I was considering responding in a language he wouldn't know), but in the end I didn't speak up at all. And, after a hundred yards or so, he gave up and went away! I have to admit, I felt slightly triumphant about the whole thing. We discussed in my criminal law class that almost any criminal suspect, subjected to constant questioning and interrogation, will finally speak, even when they know they aren't required to do so. Granted, the interrogations at issue lasted for hours or days, not 90 seconds, and were conducted with the force of the entire legal system, not by a random guy walking down the street ... but still, I was proud of my ability to withstand the pressure, slight as it may have been! (And really, subjected to this stuff day in and day out, it gets pretty wearing - the pressure is a bit more significant than it may seem.)
However, I haven't completely persuaded my brain to shut off, like I have my mouth. I feel pretty good about ignoring people who seem to be trying to sell me something, but it's harder to ignore people on the street who are just being very friendly (but when I strike up conversations, they generally end in either "Where do you live?" or "Do you know of any jobs in America for me?"). And it's INCREDIBLY hard to ignore the beggars. Cairo doesn't have too many - I think San Fran easily beats it for the number of homeless people - but there are definitely a lot of very poor people here, who have learned that light-skinned foreigners are easy targets. Thus, I tend to get targeted by children, especially (or their parents, who point me out and send them after me), who tug on my sleeves and point to their mouths, or old women with no teeth who cross the street when they see me.
Here's my problem: Egypt has no social security or welfare system, which means that these beggars are very likely begging because they have no other option. Especially since most beggars are female, which means there probably aren't low-skill jobs available for them - road cleaners and the like are all men. And from what I understand, Islam frowns on begging - I'm not entirely certain why, but I suspect it has something to do with the "God will provide you with whatever you need" theory of religion. This means that the locals probably aren't helping much, so me and my fellow foreigners are close to a last resort for these women and children. But I object to handouts in general - the whole "give a man a fish" theory - and do not think handing over a pound or two will really do more than temporarily alleviate suffering. (Although I often think that temporary alleviation is pretty valuable in itself ...) To reconcile myself with the situation, I've resolved to research and donate to a good, worthwhile Egyptian organization ... but it doesn't make it easier to walk away from the three-year olds with the huge eyes and dirty clothes.
Which brings me back to the point - I've learned to ignore people, shut them out. While it's absolutely necessary to do that here - even my coworkers insist I don't talk to people on the street, because they will try to take advantage of me - I honestly don't think it's a great trait to have. Once I get back to the states, I'll have to relearn friendliness - it'll be strange to be somewhere where smiling at a stranger on the street isn't taboo. It's good that I've learned to live here, but if I'm rude to any of you once I get back, I'm sorry - it's just that I've adapted too well.
Most notably, I'm not hassled by touts like I used to be. Now, part of it is that I'm not frequenting tourist sites - clearly, there will be more people to contend with outside the Egyptian Museum than in my residential neighborhood - but I think it's more than that. I've developed the all-important skill of IGNORING EVERYONE.
I was raised to be polite, and although I sometimes slip up, as a general rule, I'm a huge fan of common courtesy. And so, when people talk to me, it's pretty natural for me to answer. This, of course, is how the many harrassing sales-people get their openings. They say "Hello" or "Welcome to Egypt" or whatever, and as soon as the foreigner responds in kind, the game begins. So what I needed to do was JUST NOT ANSWER.
It's harder than it sounds. If someone is clearly speaking to ME (and if they're speaking in English, it's fair to assume they're speaking to me), it's automatic for me to respond with the standard niceties. But this impulse always lead me to trouble here, and so I needed to quash it.
As evidence of my success, consider this: one morning, walking from my minibus to the office, a young man started walking beside me. "Hello," he said. "Where you from?" I didn't answer, and he just kept up - "What's your name?" "Where you going?" and so on. It was HARD to say nothing, and I actually tried to rack my brain for the right thing to say to get him to go away without thinking I'm a royal bitch (I was considering responding in a language he wouldn't know), but in the end I didn't speak up at all. And, after a hundred yards or so, he gave up and went away! I have to admit, I felt slightly triumphant about the whole thing. We discussed in my criminal law class that almost any criminal suspect, subjected to constant questioning and interrogation, will finally speak, even when they know they aren't required to do so. Granted, the interrogations at issue lasted for hours or days, not 90 seconds, and were conducted with the force of the entire legal system, not by a random guy walking down the street ... but still, I was proud of my ability to withstand the pressure, slight as it may have been! (And really, subjected to this stuff day in and day out, it gets pretty wearing - the pressure is a bit more significant than it may seem.)
However, I haven't completely persuaded my brain to shut off, like I have my mouth. I feel pretty good about ignoring people who seem to be trying to sell me something, but it's harder to ignore people on the street who are just being very friendly (but when I strike up conversations, they generally end in either "Where do you live?" or "Do you know of any jobs in America for me?"). And it's INCREDIBLY hard to ignore the beggars. Cairo doesn't have too many - I think San Fran easily beats it for the number of homeless people - but there are definitely a lot of very poor people here, who have learned that light-skinned foreigners are easy targets. Thus, I tend to get targeted by children, especially (or their parents, who point me out and send them after me), who tug on my sleeves and point to their mouths, or old women with no teeth who cross the street when they see me.
Here's my problem: Egypt has no social security or welfare system, which means that these beggars are very likely begging because they have no other option. Especially since most beggars are female, which means there probably aren't low-skill jobs available for them - road cleaners and the like are all men. And from what I understand, Islam frowns on begging - I'm not entirely certain why, but I suspect it has something to do with the "God will provide you with whatever you need" theory of religion. This means that the locals probably aren't helping much, so me and my fellow foreigners are close to a last resort for these women and children. But I object to handouts in general - the whole "give a man a fish" theory - and do not think handing over a pound or two will really do more than temporarily alleviate suffering. (Although I often think that temporary alleviation is pretty valuable in itself ...) To reconcile myself with the situation, I've resolved to research and donate to a good, worthwhile Egyptian organization ... but it doesn't make it easier to walk away from the three-year olds with the huge eyes and dirty clothes.
Which brings me back to the point - I've learned to ignore people, shut them out. While it's absolutely necessary to do that here - even my coworkers insist I don't talk to people on the street, because they will try to take advantage of me - I honestly don't think it's a great trait to have. Once I get back to the states, I'll have to relearn friendliness - it'll be strange to be somewhere where smiling at a stranger on the street isn't taboo. It's good that I've learned to live here, but if I'm rude to any of you once I get back, I'm sorry - it's just that I've adapted too well.
posted by Teale at 12:08 PM
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